Monday, January 18, 2010

Flat Lemonade

I've had a frustrating day.
Mornings are always too early, nights are always too late.
My Ipod keeps playing the same songs even though it's on shuffle and I can't have run out of 1g of music in 2 days or so.
My friend txted me and told me people keep getting her name wrong. They call her Tony or Troy and that's not her name. She keeps telling everyone "no, the O goes before the R" or "it's an R not an N".
Of course I know how my friend feels coz being called Varelai, it's utterly frustrating that people are never able to pronounce my name or spell it.
I love my name, of course, it's very unique but people always ask me if I'm from another country and that also gets annoying.
And then when I got home, I went to pour myself a nice drink, as I do some nights. A peachtini with lemonade is my drink at the moment.
But the lemonade is flat so it just tastes like well awful. Yes, it tastes like awful. If awful had a taste it would taste like peach schnapps, vodka and flat lemonade but I can't waste alcohol. Even if I feel very very ill, I can't puke from drinking coz of the "wasting alcohol" factor. Yea.
THEN my mum made dinner for her and my brother and not me. Great mothering that is.

Anyway, my main point of today, aside from being frustrated and tired and hungry is that I know people who spend ages in the bathroom.
I don't really understand it.
When I go to the bathroom, I pee then wash my hands. A friend of mine believed it was important to count the amount of seconds you pee for so lets say 30 seconds is a SUPER long pee. Then you have a minute or so for pants down, pants up, wipe (if you're female). Then hand washing is an average of 2 minutes (should be) but most people wash for so much less. Lets say a minute on average.
So we arrive at around 3 minutes. That is the average person's peeing life. Now, we're not talking about the other bathroom stuff. Just peeing coz people often elaborate on what they're going to the bathroom to do. As horrible as that is.
So you know they're peeing. But then, these few people I know, take 15 minutes or MORE to do this peeing routine.
It really confuses me. Now, I don't know why it's any of my business how long they take to do their business but when you're alone in someone elses house and waiting for your friend to pee, you're waiting and you're bored and alone so you notice how long the other person is taking.
Now although they say they're peeing maybe they just need to do other things but don't know it till they get there so they do that and add to their time.
BUT they wouldn't be doing the latter EVERY time they go to the bathroom. That would be super amazing, like they are living on a diet of prunes or something.

So yea, just confused and thought I'd share.

Have fun peeing, I'm counting.
Varelai.

2 comments:

  1. Varelai, I love it! Sooo incredibly funny! "The average person's peeing life". You've monitored that quite right: what the hell are these people doing?
    The only situation where I could understand why it takes them so long in the bathroom is when they use the bathroom at Mac's Brewery in Wellington, because they've got hair straighteners in the bathrooms there, so girls may straighten their hair while the people waiting for them wonder what they are doing (and that could take up quite a while, especially when you have rebellious curls like I do - but then, again, I wouldn't get the idea to straighten my hair while someone's waiting for me outside...).
    Dear 15-minutes-in-the-bathroom-people, please let us know: what the hell are you doing all that time?

    Well... no, actually... maybe we don't want to know.

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  2. Haha! You're pretty funny yourself!
    HAIR STRAIGHTENERS IN A BREWERY?! Wtf! That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. For one, what sort of woman goes to a brewery and two, why would they WANT to straighten their hair there!
    Crazy stuff!

    And you're right, we don't REALLY want to know, however, curiosity killed the cat and we are curious so perhaps we do need to know what takes you 15 minutes or MORE!

    Thanks for your comment =)

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