You'll always be my favourite one

For you... If you read this you'll know who you are but you won't read it and you'll never know. A fact for which I'm deeply glad.

If sarcasm was the lowest form of wit, he'd score below zero.
If religion saved lives, he'd be dead.
If his words to me were the sun, he'd be a Wellington summer.
If knowledge was a fountain, he'd be overflowing.
If music was a colour, he'd be a rainbow.
If clothes made the man, he'd be more man than most.
If humour was a flock of sheep, he'd be New Zealand.
If intelligence had a number, he'd be pushing a trillion.
If nerves were earthquakes, he'd send me to Wellington.
If looks could kill, he'd be a serial murderer.
If movies were stars, he'd be the night sky.
If a friend was a blade of grass, he'd have a field.
If smiles were lightbulbs, he'd glow the brightest.
If eyes were windows, he'd be a view to a watery paradise.
If bodies were art, he'd be the most beautiful and saught-after.
If facial expressions told a story, he'd be a novel.
If hair was the world, he'd change like the weather.
If secrets were oceans, he'd be deep in my depths.

If I were better, maybe he'd like me.

Varelai.