Hey,
Last night I was told by a guy that when a guy and a girl go out to dinner, it is considered rude if the guy does not pay for dinner.
It doesn't matter if the girl asked the guy out to dinner or if they're just going out to dinner as friends, the same rule apparantly applies.
It's kind of strange to me that there should be such a sexist rule in this day and age.
I went out to dinner with a guy not so long ago and he paid for dinner. I was shocked and impressed when he paid because I didn't expect it. I already had my wallet out, ready to pay my half and he told me not to worry and that he had it covered.
I didn't know that maybe he was just paying because of some unspoken guy rule and because he thought it was expected that he do so.
Of course, maybe he wasn't just doing it because he "had" to, maybe he was doing it because he's a gentleman and thought it was a nice thing to do, which it was.
So, what do you all think?
I think maybe the person who initiates the dinner should pay. So, in this situation, it would have been me.
What if two girls go out to dinner, as partners or as friends, who pays then?
Half and half is also another good solution. Paying for your half of the meal just seems fair.
If I go out to dinner with this guy again, something I plan on doing, I wouldn't expect him to pay again, in fact I wouldn't LET him pay again.
Sure, it's a nice gesture but to me, it's not fair that he pay EVERY time we go to dinner, I'd feel cruel letting him pay if I knew he was doing it just because of some unwritten rule, that he thinks it'd be considered rude for him not to.
For me, it's rude if I don't at LEAST offer to pay and more rude if I let him pay fully more than once.
I've always been taught, coming from a poor family, that if I want something, I need to pay for it myself so going halves in the dinner is the least I can do to be polite.
George Costanza from Seinfeld, one of the people I've always liked and admired for his attitude towards everything, said that all he wants is for the girl to "make the grab" for the check.
"GEORGE: That's a very good question. You know she and I go out for dinner,
she doesn't even reach for the check. Thats all Im asking for is a reach.
Is that so much to ask for?"
Even if he ends up paying anyway, he just wants the girl to at least attempt to pay to show she cares.
What's your opinion?
Varelai.
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Yeeeeesssssss! That means, I publicly offended my ex when we were still together! Score!
ReplyDeleteAnd well, after previous experiences I came to the conclusion: if a guy wants to give you something (no matter what, if it's a dinner or just a cup of coffee, an engagement ring or just an easter egg) and you DON'T take it, because you're too proud or you feel bad because he's paying for everything and you can't give anything bad... well, that means automatically the end to your relationship. From that point on, things will go weird, because the guy doesn't understand your reaction or maybe interpret its the wrong way. He might think he is being rejected although all you wanted to do is being nice - as nice as he is to you. So even if you feel bad about him paying the dinner: let him pay and enjoy your life, otherwise you'll regret it sooner or later anyway.